The Feedback Phase

In the feedback phase, facilitators have a chance to learn from others, and improve their facilitation skills.

While Social Meditation generally has 3 phases of practice–the Setup, Practice, & Reflection phases–there's an additional phase that's possible for Facilitators, after the reflection is over. In the Feedback phase, the Facilitator has an opportunity to request feedback from their peers (i.e. other Facilitators) and share their own sense of how things went.

Here are the specific steps we use for Facilitator feedback within the context of Interbe.ing:

Step 1: What worked well?

• First, the Facilitator begins by sharing what they felt worked well during the session.

• Next, the Facilitator invites their peers to share their perspective on what worked well, as they feel moved. If someone doesn't want to share, that's fine, as soon as everyone has shared you move on to the next step.

Step 2: What would you change?

• Same as last step, the Facilitator begins by expressing what they'd want to change next time they facilitate the same practice.

• Next, the Facilitator invites their peers, as they feel moved, to share any feedback they have on what they would do differently next time, if they were you.

  • NOTE: Clarifying questions from the Facilitator are fine, as they can help us to better understand the feedback being offered, but the aim here isn't to get into a debate about the feedback. A simple "thank you" often works well upon receiving feedback, even if you don't agree with it. Otherwise, all cross-talk at this stage is discouraged, as getting into arguments about feedback is all too easy.

A few more thoughts on feedback

• We start with what worked well, first, because of the negativity bias, which often takes the form of a culture of feedback in which the critical feedback is over-emphasized. With respect to feedback, there are generally 2 extremes: On the one side people won't ask for feedback at all, and thus stunt their growth, and on the other side they'll be open to feedback, but the tone and tenor of the feedback is overly harsh & critical, perhaps even abusive. Here, we're aiming for a process that sits between these two extremes.

• If we don't know what is working about our facilitation, then we're more likely to stop doing what works, and that has a negative impact on our facilitation. It's also true that for many of us, we're doing great on most things, and just need some positive reinforcement to trust that this is the case. Receiving sincere positive feedback, including from yourself, goes a long way toward building confidence.

• Framing the critical feedback, in terms of what you'd change if you were doing this again, is really important, because it allows us to look at our facilitation as an iterative learning journey. Every time we facilitate there's something we can learn about how it went, and if we generate a strong learning loop, we'll become top-notch Facilitators in no time!

• It's just as important to respect & honor the time of your peers, during the Feedback phase, as it is to honor the time of meditators, during the previous phases. If you are doing live feedback, after the session is over, please end the session on time, and then complete the feedback process within a reasonable amount of time (recommendation: no more than 15 minutes). You're always welcome to extend the session if there's more feedback, but if you keep cross-talking to a minimum it shouldn't take that long. If you do extend the session, please give everyone an explicit off-ramp after 15 minutes, so that you don't hold anyone hostage in the session. More contentious (i.e. other-focused) people will tend to stay on, even when it makes sense to end.

• It's important that in a peer-context the Facilitator facilitate the feedback session. The role of Facilitator doesn't end after the Reflection phase.